Corbyn declares war on M&S Food Halls

Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn has promised to put an end to the ‘outrageous decadence’ of Marks and Spencer’s Food Halls, calling for them to be ‘consigned to the dustbin of history, where they truly belong’.

Speaking at a press conference last night, Mr. Corbyn had this to say:

‘The revolutionaries of tomorrow will not be raised on a diet of goat’s cheese salads and ham hock terrine’

‘The working man needs sausage rolls, and that is what my Labour party will give them’.

‘Sausage rolls for everyone. Onward to victory’.

The Liberal Democrats were quick to condemn these statements, declaring that the true revolution would be built on a diet of gruel and warm water.

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