*Militant livestock launch unprovoked attack on Russian warship*

The 78 man crew of a Russian spy ship had to be evacuated today, after a suspected attack by militant livestock.

The incident took place just off the Turkish coast, when a freight ship reportedly from Togo, deliberately crashed into the Russian vessel, causing it to sink soon after.

Port records confirm the passengers on the freighter were predominantly livestock, leading to speculation that this was a deliberate attack by the Sheep and Cow Liberation Front, a known terrorist organisation responsible for numerous sea-based incidents.

Russian President Vladimir Putin released a statement condemning the attack, and warned the SCLF against further actions, saying ‘I will hunt you down, then it’s hamburgers for dinner’

This comes just days after the Equine Alliance, a notorious vigilante group, claimed responsibility for the downing of a Chinese Military Reconnaissance plane.

Full story here: http://bit.ly/2qcLh9W

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