President Putin has today revealed plans to invade the Ukraine, with the help of his good friend, Hollywood actor Steven Seagal. At a press conference this afternoon, the Russian strongman had this to say:
‘I got the idea from an unused script for ‘Under Siege 3: Total War’
‘Producers weren’t interested, so I called Steven, and asked if he wanted to do it for real’
‘He agreed, so now we’re going to march on Kiev’
Mr. Putin went on to explain how the plan would work:
‘Steven will go on ahead, as a sort of one man army, and when he’s cleared a path, I’ll send the tanks in. We’ll storm the Parliament building together, plant the flag, and declare immediate martial law’
‘It’ll be great’
This news comes just days after the Belgian government announced Jean-Claude Van Damme had been recruited to fight ISIS.
Full story here: http://ind.pn/2pMMiox
WHAT A HOOT!