Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn today declared himself a modern-day prophet, who has looked into the future, and witnessed the downfall of mankind.
‘I have seen the day of reckoning’, he told a stunned audience of party members.
‘Like a 21st century Nostradamus, I have had visions of disasters yet to come’
‘The end of days is upon us. On June 8th humanity will make its last stand, but will ultimately fail. The only salvation is a mysterious bearded man. An underdog fighting for the people. A man of principle, honour and decency. A man for the many, not the few’
‘But where can we find such a man? The answer will be revealed in due course’
When asked by journalists to justify his claims of clairvoyance, a righteous Mr. Corbyn said:
‘I predicted 9/11 before it happened, but nobody listened’
‘I saw the Chernobyl meltdown in my dreams, but nobody was interested’
‘I also successfully predicted the 100/1 outside victory of Mon Mome in the 2009 Grand National’
‘You can definitely trust me’
‘Vote Labour on June 8th’
Full story here: http://bit.ly/2qNVytS
WHAT A HOOT!