The Football Association has today announced retrospective bans for any fans caught eating prawn sandwiches. A spokesman for the FA said:
‘Prawn sandwiches are the scourge of the modern game, and for too long, people have been getting away with it. Therefore we have no choice but to introduce a two match ban for any any fans seen eating one’.
‘This epidemic started at Old Trafford several years ago, but has since spread throughout top-flight football, and if left unchecked, could even make its way to the lower leagues’.
‘It’s time to send a message. This behaviour will no longer be tolerated’.
Football fans responded positively to the news, although some called for the ban to be expanded further, to include people who wear half-and-half scarves, tourist day trippers, and those who like to sit down during games’.
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WHAT A HOOT!