Theresa May has finally discovered the location of the mythical magic money tree – it was in her back garden all along!
‘I don’t know how I missed it’, said Mrs. May at a press conference.
‘I woke up yesterday morning, opened the curtains, and there it was’.
‘Now I can live the life I’ve always dreamed of’.
‘I can travel the world, dine at the finest restaurants, and give generously to the DUP, to thank them for their loyal support’.
‘Maybe build some schools and hospitals too’.
This news comes just days after Labour leader Jeremy Corbyn discovered some cash flowers growing in his allotment, which he said would ‘finally put an end to inequality, injustice, oppression, and cruelty’.
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