The shocking rise in knife crime has been blamed on an increasing number of angry crows, who feel compelled to carry weapons for ‘self-defence’ purposes, despite it being illegal to do so.
A spokesman for the National Union of Crows, defended this habit, saying:
‘Our members no longer feel safe. We think it is perfectly reasonable to carry knives, because terrorists can strike at any time, and we want to be prepared’.
‘If anybody tries to attack us, they’re in for an extremely nasty surprise’.
This news comes just days after the British Goose Force encouraged their associates to carry a concealed handgun at all times ‘because you never know when you might need to open fire’.
Full story here: http://bbc.in/2s2P3Ar
WHAT A HOOT!